You're on Your Own (But I'm Here If You Need Me): Mentoring Your Child During the College Years

From Publishers Weekly
Savage, who has worked with parents and students at the University of Minnesota for a decade (she's now the director of its parent-liaison program), addresses the sometimes tough issues facing parents and their college-age kids, as the latter seek independence (but still rely on counsel from Mom and Dad) and the former try to figure out just how involved they should be in Jr.'s undergraduate experience. In 12 chapters that span the summer before college, the culture shock of school (and the corresponding empty-nest shake-up for parents), the freshman 15, course loads, extracurricular activities, risky or defiant behaviors and life beyond the BA, Savage gives parents clear and seasoned advice-and offers tips for students as well. Illustrating her points through anecdotes, charts and bullet-pointed lists, she crafts a readable, if sometimes very commonsensical, guide to establishing the right level of parental involvement. For nervous parents, this should be a reassuring and helpful book. Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.


From Booklist
Based on 10 years of experience working as a liaison between parents and the University of Minnesota, Savage offers sound advice on how parents can balance their continued involvement and their college student's need for independence. She notes that technology has helped to maintain contact between parents and students, but what hasn't changed are issues of how much autonomy to grant, when to let go, and when and how to help as the parent-child relationship is redefined. Savage offers strategies for everything from dealing with complaints about the food, to resisting the temptation to decorate the dorm room, to monitoring students' health, and teaching them to take responsibility for their finances. Savage includes anecdotes and advice from parents and university staff members on how to equip students on their journey toward their degrees and how to measure the campus social scene against the family's values. Parents with children in college or headed to college will appreciate Savage's support and advice. Vanessa Bush
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved


Review
Richard M. Flaherty President, College Parents of America Answers to many college parenting issues and problems in an easily understood format.


Book Description
Realistic and practical advice for parents of college-age kids Parents whose kids are away at college have a tough tightrope to walk: they naturally want to stay connected to their children, yet they also need to let go. What's more, kids often send mixed messages: they crave space, but they rely on their parents' advice and assistance. Not surprisingly, it's hard to know when it's appropriate to get involved in your child's life and when it's better to back off. You're On Your Own (But I'm Here If You Need Me) helps parents identify the boundaries between necessary involvement and respect for their child's independence. Marjorie Savage, who as a parent herself empathizes with moms and dads, but who as a student services professional understands kids, offers advice on wide-ranging issues, including: • How to cope with your family's mood changes in the months before move-in day on campus • Why students complain about the food but still manage to gain fifteen pounds their first year • How to teach basic financial responsibility, including the handling of credit cards and academic expenses • When parental intervention is critical With anecdotes and suggestions from experienced parents and college staffs nationwide, the strategies and tips provided throughout will help you to create a loving, supportive partnership responsive to the needs of both you and your children.


About the Author
Marjorie Savage is the Parent Program director at the University of Minnesota, serving as a liaison between the school and the parents of its 28,000 undergraduates. She lives in Inver Grove Heights, Minnesota.


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For many parents, sending children to college can be overwhelming and anxiety-inducing. Savage, director of the Parent Program at the University of Minnesota, hopes to ease their fears with knowledge gleaned from her organization, which acts as a liaison between students and parents, and her own experiences as a mother. She provides strategies and tips for parents wanting to stay connected with their kids while allowing them to make adult decisions on their own. Using anecdotes and straightforward suggestions, the book covers a wide range of topics, such as how to prepare for move-in day on campus, deal with student complaints, teach financial responsibility, and when to intervene. Psychosocial issues such as depression, drugs, and alcohol are also covered. Overall, this guide provides an insightful look at what is "normal" for teens at this stage in their development and helps parents identify how to help their children without being overbearing. Strongly recommended for public libraries.-Charity Peak, Regis Univ., Colorado Springs Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information.


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