Visits : Caring for an Aging Parent: Reflections and Advice

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As one demographic anomaly (the baby boom) faces another (the ever-increasing number of "aged aged," people over age 75 or 80 or even 100), libraries can expect demand for both practical guidebooks and personal narratives on the new challenge of "parenting one's parents." Visits is a bit of both, from an author involved, often at long distance, in the care of both her 65-year-old mother, forced by Parkinson's disease to dwell in a retirement home, and her 88-year-old grandmother, still living "indefatigably, independently in her own home." Chearney's dozens of brief essays offer plenty of useful facts (medical, legal, institutional, etc.), but readers may appreciate even more Chearney's thoughtful comments on the emotional complexity of the shifting relationship of parent and child. As with other types of self-help books, simply the recognition that "I am not alone" allows many readers to cope more effectively with their genuinely daunting problems. Appendixes list important legal and financial papers and questions to ask about any nursing home or other retirement facility. Mary Carroll


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Visits is a book of inspiration, affirmation, and useful advice for anyone participating in the care of an aging or seriously ill parent. Based on the author's experiences as a caregiver for her mother, who is now in the late stages of Parkinson's disease, and her 88-year-old grandmother, who still lives in her own home, Visits offers entries of comfort and counsel for children of aging parents as they mark this difficult transition with their loved one. Resonating with empathy, the entries in this important book also contain invaluable, practical information on living wills, insurance, coping, communicating with health care providers, home care tips, and more. A resource section lists essential organizations and agencies to turn to for help and assistance.


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