The Lost Art of Compassion: Discovering the Practice of Happiness in the Meeting of Buddhism and Psychology

Amazon.com
For modern Westerners groomed to be competitive, insatiable, and as hyperactive as hamsters, The Lost Art of Compassion stops us dead in our frantic tracks. With a zenlike whack to the side of our heads, Ladner deftly applies the pragmatic methods of Buddhism to psychology, reminding us that genuine happiness won't come from our misdirected striving and craving. A clinical psychologist and longtime Tibetan practitioner, Ladner has written a deeply innovative and kind how-to guide that reclaims the foundations of authentic contentment and compassion. The Western practice of psychology has taught us to work with damaging emotions and patterns, but according to Ladner has not offered "even one clear, practical, well-researched method for people to use to develop compassion." In contrast, the Buddhist tradition of mind-training focuses on the steady cultivation of positive emotions and mental states such as affection, even-mindedness, empathy, gratitude, and especially compassion. By practicing, we not only free ourselves from negative emotions, but are moved to ease the human suffering around us that is fed by such emotions. Richly combining his years of clinical and spiritual work, Ladner offers 10 reflective practices that drill out "the ego's calcifications" and distorting self images, opening the space for compassion. Emphasizing that "you cannot give others what you do not have yourself," his method gradually builds outward from establishing a secure self to caring for others. And, somehow, he does this without making us feel like we need to be Mother Teresa by next week. Ladner has never forgotten how he once heard someone in Los Angeles ask the Dalai Lama "what was the 'quickest and easiest' way to enlightenment." The Dalai Lama bowed his head and began to cry. Not fast-food, Ladner's book is a gift of compassion in itself once anyone puts it to practice. --Deborah Easter


From Publishers Weekly
As the president of the Guhyasamaja Buddhist Center in Virginia, Ladner is a strong proponent of the Buddhist practice of compassion, which develops positive emotions through mental exercises. "Cultivating compassion is the single most effective way to make oneself psychologically healthy, happy and joyful," Ladner writes. "It is a direct antidote to prejudice and aggression." The author, who also works as a clinical psychologist, bemoans the lack of attention compassion receives in the West, and argues that most psychotherapists do little to help their patients increase their feelings of happiness. Nonetheless, Ladner does draw upon both Eastern and Western examples in this book, referring to sources as diverse as Jesus, T.S. Eliot, Lama Zopa Rinpoche and the Dalai Lama, as well as including numerous anecdotes from his clinical practice. Though the exercises that Ladner recommends are sometime quite elaborate-one them involves identifying your "narcissistic patterns," personifying them as enemies and battling against them-he carefully walks readers through them one chapter at a time and then organizes them into a helpful "Summary of Compassion Practices" at the end of the book. To inspire readers, Landner cites the many recent studies showing that aspects of practicing compassion can significantly improve people's stress levels and their communication and relationships with others. Readers eager to test those findings for themselves should appreciate this book's realistic, manageable approach to dispelling bitterness and anger and replacing it with empathy and patience. Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.


From Booklist
According to Buddhism, cultivating compassion is the most effective means to living a happy and healthy life. Clinical psychologist Ladner agrees and here attempts to bring Western psychology into cross-cultural dialogue with Tibetan Buddhist traditions to help readers nurture compassion, love, affection, and joy. In Buddhist psychology, compassion refers to the mental state of wanting to relieve others' suffering. In the West, however, psychology and emotion typically have been kept at arm's length. Medical schools and other Western institutions are notorious for actively discouraging compassion in professional training, and Ladner believes Western science is the lesser for it. Citing anecdotes and meditation techniques that actively engage the intellect and the imagination, he offers practical approaches to transforming the heart and cultivating compassion personally and, in effect, generally, by overcoming emotional obstacles, changing how one communicates so that messages are true and beneficial, and developing empathy even with the bitterest enemies--in essence, breaking down unhealthy and destructive patterns. The suggested methods aren't unique to Buddhism, nor need one be Buddhist to use them. June Sawyers
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved


Tara Bennett-Goleman, author of Emotional Alchemy
"Lorne Ladner is like an inner archeologist brilliantly illuminating the neglected component of personal and global transformation."


Jack Kornfield, author of A Path With Heart
"A helpful, kindhearted, articulate teaching of the way of compassion. Buddhism and Western psychology meet here wisely and beautifully."


Annie Dillard, author of Pilgrim at Tinker Creek
"Exercising compassion will begin building an unshakeable happiness. Dr. Ladner’s written a wonderful book."


Lama Zopa Rinpoche
"This book carries the enlightened wisdom to heal relationship problems and mental suffering that trouble our life."


Philip Martin, author of The Zen Path Through Depression
"Ladner shows us that by nurturing compassion in our lives, we can discover deep strength, intimacy, and joy."


Mark Epstein, MD, author of Thoughts Without a Thinker
"Dr. Ladner's book is inspiring for all of us, therapists and patients alike."


Book Description

Western culture has long sidelined compassion as the province of the saintly or the overly naïve. To our great detriment, we have overlooked one of our most powerful inner resources for creating a life of happiness and contentment. In The Lost Art of Compassion, clinical psychologist and longtime Tibetan Buddhist practitioner Lorne Ladner rescues compassion from the margins, and demonstrates its direct and powerful benefits for our day-to-day lives.

Until recently Western psychology focused almost exclusively on working with unhealthy emotions and relationships, turning very little of its research or expertise toward understanding positive emotional states. While interest in positive psychology is just dawning in the West, the cultivation of compassion has been a cornerstone of Tibetan Buddhism, studied and developed for over a thousand years. The Lost Art of Compassion is the first book to incorporate the Tibetan Buddhist teachings most suited to Westerners and provides a crucial perspective that is sorely lacking in Western psychology. Bringing together the best contributions of psychology and Buddhism, Dr. Ladner bridges the gap between East and West, theory and practice, in this user-friendly guide for getting through each day with greater contentment and ease.

FROM THE PUBLISHER

Western culture has long sidelined compassion as the province of the saintly or the overly naive. To our great detriment, we have overlooked one of our most powerful inner resources for creating a life of happiness and contentment. In The Lost Art of Compassion, clinical psychologist and longtime Tibetan Buddhist practitioner Lorne Ladner rescues compassion from the margins, and demonstrates its direct and powerful benefits for our day-to-day lives. Until recently Western psychology focused almost exclusively on working with unhealthy emotions and relationships, turning very little of its research or expertise toward understanding positive emotional states. While interest in positive psychology is just dawning in the West, the cultivation of compassion has been a cornerstone of Tibetan Buddhism, stuied and developed for over a thousand years. The Lost Art of Compassion is the first book to incorporate the Tibetan Buddhist teachings most suited to Westerners and provides a crucial perspective that is sorely lacking in Western psychology. Bringing together the best contributions of psychology and Buddhism, Dr. Ladner bridges the gap between East and West, theory and practice, in this user-friendly guide for getting through each day with greater contentment and ease. The Lost Art of Compassion offers ten methods for cultivating joy and contentment, bringing directly applicable wisdom to everyday situations. The result is a highly practical, engaging guide that weaves together these two disciplines and encourages readers to reclaim this neglected path to happiness.

FROM THE CRITICS

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